Posts Tagged ‘backbones’

There are times in everyone’s lives where we have been bullied.  Whether it’s a racist landlord, a perverted boss, an angry co-worker,  an alcoholic relative,  a fellow student, or maybe someone who was trusted.  Part of growing up is growing a backbone, which to me doesn’t necessarily mean do the same back.  A good friend once told me, “what you allow to remain will continue”.  I’m learning this more and more as the years go by, and how to stop bullies in their tracks.

My secret trick is to do the exact opposite back to them, or ignore them.  Nothing angers a bully into doing something stupid more than not being paid the attention they believe they deserve or crave.  When someone is ruthless to you, don’t do it back.  Sinking to their level is what a bully wants, because bullies are secretly miserable people who put on facades.  They hide behind false bravado, lawyers, muscles, or anything they can do to put up a defensive shield. 

Bullies will cross all of our paths, and the one thing that can be learned is that he bullied often become bullies themselves.  It’s a defensive reflex to do something equally horrible or worse to someone who has tried to push you around.  However, this accomplishes nothing but feeding animosity and true discontent.  The feeling of having revenge, I have found, is futile.  It is short-lived and only makes things worse in the end anyway.

After having learned this, came a rushing feeling to not caring what others think.  Standing a little straighter, extending olive branches when applicable, and knowing when to burn bridges is the freedom I found in overcoming bullies.  For anyone reading this is being bullied, I hope you know you’re not the first or the last. 

Young people have been bullied to death (literal suicide) for their weight, social status, economic status, ethnicity, beliefs, and almost any other small part of a person.  One girl in England who was 13 years old killed herself after being picked on mercilessly for her weight.  I will never forget her face, she looked like a cherub.  There was nothing wrong with her.  I, for one, wish this issue was addressed more often than it is.

Thank you for reading


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